Tuesday, February 7, 2012

recharge

Well, Vegas, I get you. I get your crazy game.

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Our trip to Sin City was a pretty short one, but we took full advantage of our time there. Returning home Saturday evening, I required a full Sunday recharge from my jam-packed two days of gambling, champagne guzzling, luxurious hotel suite lounging, and spa-ing (ahem, pretty much a full day of spa-ing. And a 45 minute bubble bath while watching television). Oh, and wining and dining with the fam, of course! A rough life we lead; thank you, a million times over, Daddy Jack and Cita for this delightfully indulgent trip.

We hadn't been away together since, well, our trip to Fredericksburg last spring, where we bought our little babe to be this Luckenbach tshirt. I had a vision of her in this outfit then: little bow (I unapologetically love me some little bows), diaper, Luckenbach t-shirt pulled over a round, perfect little tummy. I picked a blue one because I was banking on blue eyes. Just had that feeling. And here she is, my friends.

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Jackpot.

It's a funny thing, though. Somewhere around midday Friday, as I settled into round two of the pore-vaporizing steam sauna, I realized it was the longest stretch I'd been alone in...well, 8.5 months. I spent some quality time with myself as we rounded the bend on bedrest. But since then, it's been me and E. E and me. All the livelong day. And I realized something else, sitting there alone in the dark, steamy mist: I didn't quite know what to do with myself.

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This trip knocked us out of the perfect, delicate orbit that I am proud to say we have finally achieved. It was a little bit disorienting, as you fall into a second-nature routine that feels normal, but in reality, is a bit of a grind. No matter what, you're up at 6:30 caring for your little human, 7 days a week. And you're doing it (happily, for the most part) until the sun goes down, 7 days a week. Removed from it, I felt naked, suddenly realizing how wholly my badge of "stay at home" mom had come to envelop and define me. How we had fallen lock-step into parenthood, the routine. We needed this trip. And by the time we returned, a little worse for the wear, I had embraced my old self - and the freedom that came with her - and I'd be lying if I told you a piece of me wasn't sad to leave her behind in Vegas.

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But this? Oh this scrumptious little miss was so good to come home to. The 6:30 wake-up call that next morning, maybe not so much. But we have coffee for that.

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And the question I keep getting - how did she do? Well, she didn't really seem to know we were gone. It may be that she sees enough of her Gigi (and her Gigi and John are so very sweet to her) that us being gone didn't really faze her. Either we're doing something right, or she's just a wonderful, content little baby in spite of us. Either way, I'm so glad the stars aligned just right for us to make the trip happen - a little time away is good for the soul.

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And, as you can see, my tech-savvy husband managed to get my camera working again (a process that, in my defense, was neither intuitive nor easy) so hopefully posts will resume as usual. Happy February, loves. XO

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