For me, one of the most humbling, daunting, confusing parts of being a parent is knowing that our daily interactions are teaching moments. I am constantly stopping to think about what I'm really teaching her, as there are so many mistakes we inevitably make along the way, inadvertently reinforcing the wrong behaviors despite our good intentions. Luckily, it's a cumulative effect, not a one-time shot, or else we'd be in trouble.
I've been reminded of that this week as Eliza entered the clingy stage almost overnight. It's a pretty normal phase of development around 6 months, and a positive thing overall, as I recall from my attachment theory studies way back when. But she wants me and no one else, and even when it's just us, she wants me in sight at all times. I'm having to pause and consider the appropriate response in each situation, and what she learns from me. It's a tricky balance, and ultimately I go with my instincts and move forward, hoping I'm not screwing her up too badly. It's something new every day though, and should make our upcoming trip to Amarillo interesting.
I've been reminded of that this week as Eliza entered the clingy stage almost overnight. It's a pretty normal phase of development around 6 months, and a positive thing overall, as I recall from my attachment theory studies way back when. But she wants me and no one else, and even when it's just us, she wants me in sight at all times. I'm having to pause and consider the appropriate response in each situation, and what she learns from me. It's a tricky balance, and ultimately I go with my instincts and move forward, hoping I'm not screwing her up too badly. It's something new every day though, and should make our upcoming trip to Amarillo interesting.
Anyway, it got me thinking about the little messages we are sending each day, subconsciously or intentionally, as she finds her voice, learns to sit, touches/mouths everything in sight. And what lessons will be learned over time - the cumulative, deeper life lessons - that we hope she knows well by the time she goes off to college. Things like:
Chew on whatever toys you want. I am so over the germs. I work diligently to keep everything as clean as I can, but sometimes a rattle from the floor goes into the mouth and well, what are you gonna do. As my friend's daughter says, germs are good for your 'munities. New mantra as she enters mobility.
Sometimes on a chilly day, it's nice to leave your jammies on and settle in with a good book.
Occasionally you have to do things you don't want to do, like tummy time. Because it makes you stronger, it gets easier the more you do it (see?). And we'll do our best not to rescue you the minute it gets hard. That's because we love you.
But we will always encourage you as you bust a move.
Walking, talking...
Squawking. (OK, I'm actually not trying to encourage the squawking).
Even when it makes us sad, we won't stand in your way when you want to do things on your own. Like give yourself your bottle. Sniff.
One fingered bottle holding. The Miss is so dexterous. We did not teach her this.
Every once in awhile, a pink giraffe may get an eyeful. It's SO embarrassing, but it's best if you can try to laugh and move on.
Sometimes you have to put on your tights, your little bear hat, and your sweater and brave the "cold." (Austin only has "cold" weather). Layers are a good way to be prepared for any situation.
You're right, you ARE more important than College Gameday.
But on special Saturdays we can watch together. Touchdown Texas! Sorry Raiders.
You are one lucky little girl. There are so, so many people who love you dearly. Always make time for them. They are your people.
One day, you may discover we aren't the most fascinating, hilarious, wonderfully perfect people in the world as you previously thought. But we will always love you, and we will never stop hoping you'll throw a smile our way.
And of course, we will always be there when you need us.
No comments:
Post a Comment